For Reference, Next Time You're At A Pub Quiz

Hello my dear children, today I am in Sheffield, and pondering Bell Ringing. Again. Because we're here bell ringing and that's what we ponder.

I thought I'd share with you all today some useful pub quiz knowledge in the form of bell method names. A bell method is the pattern you follow when ringing that tells you when you're supposed to ring your bell and who you should follow. The names of these patterns are a) hilarious, and b) informative. For example, if you're ringing "To the Pub Doubles", it's funny because at some point someone will shout "Go: To The Pub" at you, and informative because you know it'll be rung on five bells.

"How do you know this?", I hear you cry. It's simple really, each number of bells has a different name, which is useful, but doesn't make a lot of sense.

It goes like this:

Three bells: Singles
Four bells: Minimus
Five bells: Doubles
Six bells: Minor
Seven bells: Triples
Eight bells: Major
Nine bells: Caters
Ten bells: Royal
Eleven bells: Cinques
Twelve bells: Maximus

After that people just use numbers, because there are so few places with more than twelve bells that these methods hardly ever get rung.

The best way to remember these is to split them into odd- and even-numbered bell methods. That way, you get nice patterns of:

Singles, Doubles, Triples, Caters (from the French for "four"), Cinques (From the French for "five")

and

Minimus, Minor, Major, Royal, Maximus. Which, if you think about it, is a nice little pattern in itself, with the exception of Royal, which always throws me.

Anyway, I hope this information was interesting, or at least wins you a round in a Pub Quiz at some point.

Much love xx

Thought of... Ever.

Peter Hurrell should not, NOT be allowed to wear a mankini. Ever.

Please?

(No offence, we love you and all, but there are limits...)

Life Ambition

So, I woke up the other day and had what can only be described as an epiphany; I realised that the only thing I want to achieve in life is a happy ending. I know this sounds like a big ask, but think about it. I have, I've been pondering it...

There are only really a few ingredients to a happy ending; traditionally, you have to have a handsome Prince but, to be honest, I'm closer to expecting a reasonable-looking, vaguely articulate/educated man. Secondly, I think health is of the utmost importance; not necessarily meaning I want to be stick-thin and exercise a lot, just that I want to still be able to do all the regular things I do at the moment without needing a stairlift or whatever. And still understand what an apple is for, not in the William Tell sense. Thirdly, I just want to be happy; not in a superficial way, just happy. Able to do things that I want/like to do without persecution and just generally able to enjoy life as much as I have the chance to at the moment.

Finally, it's just the fairy story appeal, isn't it? To be brutally honest, my parents ruined me when they let me constantly watch Snow White when I was younger; I grew up believing that good things happened to good people and that everyone eventually found their perfect match, their handsome prince, and everything would turn out perfectly in the end. Unfortunately, the real world isn't actually as ideal as fairy stories made it seem, and sometimes horrible things happen to normal people who try to be good. That's just the way it is.

But I stand by my beliefs; some day my Prince will come. And I probably won't even notice when he does...

Alice

Today for no apparent reason, apart from the fact she told me to, I am pondering Alice. She's really cool. She has, err, hair and a face. You know, a face. It's that lumpy thing that sits on the front of your head, next to the hairy bit....

Anyway, Alice.

She has quite a nice face, like a sort of white Cleopatra, but not as manipulative or evil, or with a really big nose. And she's got a really nice smile :-) And, errrr... It was fun to have her at the Bond Night last year, when she didn't get thrown in a paddling pool by a huge ginger. Unlike some people *ahem* Emily...

Martha thinks that Alice is "fantastical and incredibly clever and it's not fair"

Eduin thinks that Alice is "imaginative, cheery... Jonny Depp!!?!?!!?"

Leila thinks that Alice is "hot, good at English"

Alice thinks that Alice is "the pengalengalengalengalengiest". Ed disagrees...

Wer've just spent the last ten-twenty minutes, at Alice's request, trying to work out who we wanted to play us in the movie of our life. The list is as follows:

• Ed: Matt Damon, as he looks like him (and he's the pengalengalengalengalengiest)
• Eduin: Alan Rickman, or Hugh Laurie when Alice said he couldn't be Alan Rickman (as he was mean in "Love Actually"). I think Alan Rickman would be a wonderful Eduin. Hehehe, Eduin.
• Martha doesn't think Alan Rickman is vegan. If we are going by this criteria, we will be here forever trying to find someone who is an actor, and vegan, and awesome/hot enough to play Eduin.
• Martha suggests Paul McCartney.
• He is not an actor.
• Or hot enough to play Eduin.
• Alice: Probably Emma Stone, I don't know why.
• Martha: Kiera Knightley, as she has been told she looks like her. I think perhaps Jim Parsons, or even Morgan Freeman, would be a better choice.
• Martha suggests Miss Piggy.
• Leila: Jonny Depp, no questions asked :)
• Sophia: Probably... Evanna Lynch (Luna Lovegood, for those who [like me] weren't sure of the actor's name)
• As for me, we are torn between Whoopi Goldberg and Lisa Kudrow. Obviously neither of them look like me, but that is perhaps for the better.
• At a later date I have returned to this and I now suggest Neil Patrick Harris, as we have so much in common...

N.B. I think Liz should be played by Helena Bonham Carter in the movie of my life...

Computer Games

Hello All (I got told off for writing "sexy beasts" last time). How are we today? Sorry I haven't updated in a while, real life took control :(
I have been pondering computer games today for a reason which will become apparent; this evening, James (my brother) and I are at a friend's house because my parents are "sociable" and the boys I am with are intent on playing computer games all night. Which is fascinating. Except that one of them thinks anything we do is boring (but can't come up with anything better to do - genius that).

Computer games were, it appears, invented by nerds for nerds without girlfriends or the entrepreneurial skills to invent their own computer games. Or those who are bored inventing computer games and just want a break. The are the most colossal waste of time and don't do anything for any form of personal skills. Just ask my brother.

This can also be said for most of the videos on YouTube (you tube). Who cares whether or not a cat can say "no no no no no no" for a minute and a half, or whether a baby looks scared at the camera? Apparently, Russell Howard and some more nerds, who got RSI from their computer games. Actually,  there are some pretty good videos out there, such as the "Urban Sports" series and the video I will be uploading later tonight, or tomorrow, of our neighbours singing "Sweet Caroline" very excitedly at yesterday's street party.
And little clips from film and TV can be funny too.

Comments?