For me, 2012 was a year of many lessons, mostly (it felt) Chemistry, although I'm sure this is untrue. So here is my list of the Top Twenty Lessons I learnt in 2012, with the rude ones replaced by slightly less rude ones.
- ‘Yes’ means ‘no’
- Becky wants some
- Get your baps out...
- Mayans do not understand the apocalypse
- The first rule of secrets is best friends don’t count
- I definitely do not like beer. Even if teachers tell you to drink it or go to bed
- It’s not a dance if it just looks like you’re trying to reach the bisquits
- Benzene
- Sunshine is a sexy hair colour
- Cigarettes taste of death (not from experience of either)
- Rice pudding cannot be substituted for the coconut cream in a Pina Colada
- Pink shows Pip’s feminine side
- Nobody, not even Peter Hurrell, looks good in a mankini
- Schwaz has been added to Leila's phone dictionary
- There is nothing sexier than a man who can play ‘Chicken Run’ on the kazoo
- The noise bits of cow make falling on a tent
- It takes four trombonists to screw in a light bulb. One to hold the bulb and the others to drink until the room spins.
- Ice does not help the uncoordinated
- Pip’s Hot Brother, Pip’s Hot Brother, Does whatever Pip won’t do...
I hope your 2013 is a lot better than your 2012, regardless of how good 2012 was for you :)
Good luck and all that.
