A Problem Shared

Hello children. So you're back for more are you? I don't know why people keep reading this drivel, but I still enjoy writing it, so you're in luck. The pondering this week has mostly been based around my everyday life and those around me. Clearly this means that I've been pondering talking. And tea. But I don't think I could write a post about tea that anyone would willingly read.
You see, we're always told as children that a problem shared is a problem halved. But is it? What happens when the person you choose to share your problem with doesn't believe you? What if they can't solve the problem? Doesn't it just double someone else's problems? Or what if the solution they propose doesn't fit with your world view? Well, lucky for you I'm here to answer all the question you've never asked. With my own particular brand of opinionated drivel.

So let's take the first question. What if your problem is invisible? What if nobody believes the issues your having? Well, this is certainly an issue. If people can't see proof of a problem they might be unwilling to help, or they might try to convince you that nothing is wrong. This can lead to feeling like you've wasted people's time, and that your problem isn't actually a problem at all. Maybe it really is just in your head. Maybe it's not important enough to actually bother people with. Suddenly your problem is doubled, or so it seems. But why would anyone think that? If you're used to hearing things such as "Are you sure it's that bad?" or "I don't believe that's a problem," then you're not going to feel like anything is better. But maybe you've just chosen the wrong person to talk to for this problem. Find someone who believes you, or someone who will at least let you talk uninterrupted, I suppose. Last option would be a cat or something, I suppose. Maybe a tree?

OK, so you've found someone to talk to. Now what? What if they can't help you find a solution? Is there always an answer? No! Of course not! Life isn't like that, life just kind of goes off in all directions at once. But just having someone to talk to can make a huge difference to that; sometimes you can come up with ideas for the next move just by saying things out loud to another person, and sometimes they will have different ideas too. But even if you can't solve the problem between you, you've not lost anything by talking to someone, and often the small steps which can be taken to righting a wrong can't be seen from up close.
But look at what talking to someone achieves: you've reduced your stress levels, taken the baby steps and you may even have become closer to your confidante in the process. Well done you!

OK, so what now? You've talked about it, you're feeling better. Can your friend help you? Probably. Friends are good like that. But what if you don't like the answer you've been given? Well, certain arguments would suggest steaming ahead with your own plan anyway, unless you're actually going to die. Don't do that. But there is no requirement for you to listen to your friends. Anyway, who's to say your solution won't work? It's far better than having a list of "What Ifs". Sometimes you really do need to go with your gut.You can, of course, spitball all the ideas you have until you come to a compromise, but how likely is that to happen if one of you is far more invested in the issue than the other? Exactly.
But still discuss it, just in case dying really is a possibility and you've just overlooked it.

So, conclusion: Do I have one? Probably not. Do I ever have anything to say? Probably not. But my opinion is clear. TALK TO PEOPLE YOU SPANNER. If you're really having issues, of any kind, you need to talk to someone, just to make yourself more comfortable. Sometimes it just worth hearing the arguments you've had in your head out loud, so that you know how crazy you sound. Everyone needs the occasional reality check.

The End of "Stuff..."?

Hello Internet folks, I am currently pondering a dilemma and I wonder if you can help. (Although, given your usual level of response to this blog, I am not holding out much hope!) It's not a big problem to be honest, quite the opposite, but it may mean the end of this blog forever...

You see, my problem is that I don't actually seem to have any problems right now.

I have a job which, although it's not the best job in the world, I'm earning money from. And sure, it's kind of boring and the pay's not as good as it could be, but any job which you can do with minimal qualifications will be boring and, given that I'm not entitled to minimum wage, I actually earn more than I would in a bar or in most shops. Plus everyone is really nice which, for me, is more important than the work itself. And it's not like I'm even just saying that; literally everyone is nice.

There's Graham, who works for "the agency" (dun dun duuuun) but is planing on going full time. Graham has been really nice to me since I started working there, but his jokes are awful! Then there's Dannii, who only works a couple of days a week, but is absolutely lovely and I always spend too much time talking to her because she's so interesting. Also prescanning is Caroline who, although she seems lovely, I haven't had much chance to get to know, but she's always so happy and smiley. In my recent job development, I've been working more closely with Mark (who wants to join the army) and Richard (who wants to be a Social Worker/Social Work teacher, but works doing whatever he can whilst he's waiting to get the job he wants.) Mark and Richard are both great guys, although they do sometimes talk a little loudly, especially about things which should probably not be repeated here. And the army. Then, of course, there's Chloe and Anya. When the Boss isn't around, Chloe and Anya effectively run the joint; they are in charge of all the admin, all the orders, paying everyone, running meetings and making sure everyone knows what's going on. They're amazing at what they do, even if I annoy them sometimes. Then there's Matt...

I think Matt deserves a paragraph to himself. As most of you will have seen, Matt is my fantastic new boyfriend. Yes, we are that nauseating couple. No, we don't mind. Yes, we know how awful we are, but it's OK because Becky, who is terrified of inter-personal relationships says we're not just that couple, because we're also funny together. Errr, yay?

So, as you see, there is nothing for me to write whiny blog posts about any more. Does this mean the end of "Stuff I Ponder"??!?!?!?!?!

Well, in a word, "no." Weird and wonderful stuff is still guaranteed to happen in my life; I'm still doing the scouting (we've got the Beach Weekend this weekend) and I'm about to head off to Uni, which should provide many an interesting story. Plus, with a boyfriend in tow, there'll even be someone to share it with!

P.S. Good luck Mark for today and tomorrow!