Communication

Well, I'm back with a vengeance ladies and gentlemen!! I'd love to say it was because I've had nothing to do, but to be honest, I've had absolutely no time. So, whilst lots and lots of things have been happening, I haven't bothered to update y'all. I'm excited about my life at the moment and (although it is fairly standard, for me) I am very happy for my friends, whose lives are all picking up!

Anyway, there is something fairly major I'd like to whinge about/ponder today. Communication. There is one specific person, who will remain nameless, who does not reply to any message that I ever send him. Chances are, he won't read this, because I don't really matter. Thing is, he is a good friend and I see no reason why he wouldn't reply, he must just be lazy. Or I am bad at judging my friends. But it's sometimes quite important that we talk & organise things outside of school and he doesn't bother to reply, which is annoying.

On the other hand, there are some people who share every. Single. Detail of their lives with you. That gets annoying (oh, right). But seriously, those people who tweet or update Facebook every time they sneeze. It just gets really annoying. Really, really annoying. Yes, person I haven't seen for six years, it IS raining, well done!

Sorry, obviously I have a lot to moan about today and little interesting to say. I'll try and put something fun up in the next few days about Ross and his amazing, erm, hose. And our Death Match, that was epic. I came second! ;)
But seriously, Captain, if you read this (why would you?) It's be nice to actually be able to talk to you. Some of it's fairly important.

Becoming a Member

OK, today I have made a life decision, which I have been pondering for an astonishing, err, three days. (OK, I've been thinking about it for a while, but it became an actual idea a few Fridays ago - I should not be given free time.) I spoke to Inez, our Minister* at Church, over the summer and  have decided to become a Member of the Methodist Church, in a process my Dad has named "Methodising". Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I am being Methodised*.

The Official Methodising Process (but not) goes something like this: (Information c/o The Methodist Church In Britain Website*)

• "The Service of Confirmation and Reception into Membership includes two questions asked as an Affirmation of Faith: 'Do you turn away from evil and all that denies God?' and 'Do you turn to God, trusting in Jesus Christ as Lord and Saviour, and in the Holy Spirit as Helper and Guide?' The answer to both questions is 'By the grace of God I do.'"
• "After confirmation and the reception, the newly-confirmed are asked to make three promises: 'Will you commit yourself to the Christian life of worship and service, and be open to the renewing power of God?', 'Will you seek the strength of God's Spirit as you accept the cost of following Jesus Christ in your daily life?' and 'Will you witness, by word and deed, to the good news of God in Christ, and so bring glory to God?'. The response to each of these is 'With God's help I will.'"

After this, I have to shake the hand of the Minister (Inez) and am welcomed into the Church. OK, that's the difficult bit out of the way, but every time I've told people about this so far, I have been asked what the difference is between Conformation and Becoming a Member. So I looked it up, and the Methodist website explains it very well. Basically, Confirmation is exactly that; confirming your belief in God and publicly reaffirming the promises made for/by you at your Baptism/Christening. Becoming a Member makes you a member of a specific Church and allows you to take on certain responsibilities within that Church*. I am becoming a Member at Goff's Oak Methodist Church*, where I have been attending services and activities for a very long time.

*See next post, a glossary and "Useful Websites" index.

Fridgey Fridgey Fridge Fridge

Hallo zusammen, as they say in Germany (yes, it does mean "hello together", but try not to be so literal, it's just a general greeting) My ponderances today are on the madness and determined-ness of the human spirit. It really is a fantastic thing.

This morning, I heard an amazing interview on the radio (BBC Radio 2, Chris Evans' Breakfast Show - possibly the best show on the radio) with a man named Tony "The Fridge" Morrison who has set himself the challenge of running thirty half marathons - the equivalent of fifteen actual marathons- with a fridge strapped to his back! It is simply amazing; I could do anything with a fridge strapped to my back, except for lying on top of a fridge...

Anyway, it turns out he's trying to raise money for the Sir Bobby Robson Foundation, which work to diagnose and treat cancer in its early stages. The fridge he's carrying weighs about 6 stone and he's now on day 26 of 30, cumulating in the Great North Run (whenever that is, presumably soon). The best bit about this is that he's running the same course 30 times, instead of visiting 30 different organised half marathons in order to (I assume) raise the money quicker.

This has really shown me how amazing humnas are as a race (no pun intended); why would anyone feel the need to run 633 kilometres (393.3 miles) with a fridge strapped to their back? Because they want to raise awareness for a fantastic cause and help others. This is one of the most wonderful things I've ever heard of someone doing, as well as one of the most mad, so if you're interested in following Tony's excapades, please look him up on Twitter: @tony_the_fridge or check out his Just Giving account here if you want to donate some money.

This really is a great cause, so please check it out and add your support.
Much love xx

Testimony - For the Goffs Oak Methodist Church Holiday Club

Hey, people of the internet (whether or not you are reading is your choice). I'm sorry that I haven't written on here for a while, but I've been busy and away; mostly at the same time. So, this week I am helping at the Church Holiday Club. I have, therefore, been pondering my faith. (At this point, I'd like to apologise to any Atheists out there who are offended, but I'd hope that if you're reading this you'd at least respect other people's views). This sounds odd, but please bear with it...

There are many different ways to experience God; some people can see a beautiful sunset or a night sky and see His hand at work, whereas others can see God’s presence in the good deeds of others. For me, I experienced God the most when I visited Spring Harvest, a meeting of thousands of Christians in the convenient location of Skegness (Butlins...). Being with so many other people who all believe the same as me and were happy to talk openly about it was fantastic.

One day, during a prayer of devotion (everyone offering their lives to promote the love of God) I suddenly felt this amazing bond, as though I realised now what I’d never realised before. I had always been told that God loved me; that He had sent His son Jesus, who had died for me, and that one day I would understand His big plan for myself. But now, after this amazing experience I realised how true this was, and how much it meant that God wanted me to be part of his team*. This may all sound ridiculous to you, but being with so many other people who were all worshipping together made me realise how important I was to God, and how much He loves me. It has helped me to see live in a completely different way.

*The Holiday Club is based on the Olympics.

Life Ambition

So, I woke up the other day and had what can only be described as an epiphany; I realised that the only thing I want to achieve in life is a happy ending. I know this sounds like a big ask, but think about it. I have, I've been pondering it...

There are only really a few ingredients to a happy ending; traditionally, you have to have a handsome Prince but, to be honest, I'm closer to expecting a reasonable-looking, vaguely articulate/educated man. Secondly, I think health is of the utmost importance; not necessarily meaning I want to be stick-thin and exercise a lot, just that I want to still be able to do all the regular things I do at the moment without needing a stairlift or whatever. And still understand what an apple is for, not in the William Tell sense. Thirdly, I just want to be happy; not in a superficial way, just happy. Able to do things that I want/like to do without persecution and just generally able to enjoy life as much as I have the chance to at the moment.

Finally, it's just the fairy story appeal, isn't it? To be brutally honest, my parents ruined me when they let me constantly watch Snow White when I was younger; I grew up believing that good things happened to good people and that everyone eventually found their perfect match, their handsome prince, and everything would turn out perfectly in the end. Unfortunately, the real world isn't actually as ideal as fairy stories made it seem, and sometimes horrible things happen to normal people who try to be good. That's just the way it is.

But I stand by my beliefs; some day my Prince will come. And I probably won't even notice when he does...

Alice

Today for no apparent reason, apart from the fact she told me to, I am pondering Alice. She's really cool. She has, err, hair and a face. You know, a face. It's that lumpy thing that sits on the front of your head, next to the hairy bit....

Anyway, Alice.

She has quite a nice face, like a sort of white Cleopatra, but not as manipulative or evil, or with a really big nose. And she's got a really nice smile :-) And, errrr... It was fun to have her at the Bond Night last year, when she didn't get thrown in a paddling pool by a huge ginger. Unlike some people *ahem* Emily...

Martha thinks that Alice is "fantastical and incredibly clever and it's not fair"

Eduin thinks that Alice is "imaginative, cheery... Jonny Depp!!?!?!!?"

Leila thinks that Alice is "hot, good at English"

Alice thinks that Alice is "the pengalengalengalengalengiest". Ed disagrees...

Wer've just spent the last ten-twenty minutes, at Alice's request, trying to work out who we wanted to play us in the movie of our life. The list is as follows:

• Ed: Matt Damon, as he looks like him (and he's the pengalengalengalengalengiest)
• Eduin: Alan Rickman, or Hugh Laurie when Alice said he couldn't be Alan Rickman (as he was mean in "Love Actually"). I think Alan Rickman would be a wonderful Eduin. Hehehe, Eduin.
• Martha doesn't think Alan Rickman is vegan. If we are going by this criteria, we will be here forever trying to find someone who is an actor, and vegan, and awesome/hot enough to play Eduin.
• Martha suggests Paul McCartney.
• He is not an actor.
• Or hot enough to play Eduin.
• Alice: Probably Emma Stone, I don't know why.
• Martha: Kiera Knightley, as she has been told she looks like her. I think perhaps Jim Parsons, or even Morgan Freeman, would be a better choice.
• Martha suggests Miss Piggy.
• Leila: Jonny Depp, no questions asked :)
• Sophia: Probably... Evanna Lynch (Luna Lovegood, for those who [like me] weren't sure of the actor's name)
• As for me, we are torn between Whoopi Goldberg and Lisa Kudrow. Obviously neither of them look like me, but that is perhaps for the better.
• At a later date I have returned to this and I now suggest Neil Patrick Harris, as we have so much in common...

N.B. I think Liz should be played by Helena Bonham Carter in the movie of my life...

List Of Things One May Feel Inclined To Buy Cards For

• Birthdays
• Christmas
• Easter
• Eid
• Hannuhak
• Diwali
• Valentine's Day
• Mother's/Mothers' Day
• Father's/Fathers' Day
• Anniversary
• Engagement
• Wedding
• Wedding Acceptance (Sender)
• Sorry, We Can't Come To Your Wedding/Soiree (Sender)
• Grievances/With Sympathy
• New Baby
• Christening/Batism/Whatever
• Good Luck
• Passing Exams
• General Congratulations
• New Home
• Getting A New Address (Sender)
• We're Moving! (Sender)
• Apology
• Late Birthday
• Thank You
• New Job
• New School
• Leaving An Old Job
• Retirement
• Get Well Soon
• Justin Bieber Day. (It's actually a thing. Today. If you send me a card for this, I will disassociate myself from you permanently.)

Any I've missed, please feel free to add :-)

Year 13 :S

This week, as the current Year Thirteens have been planning and executing their final scheduled days at Owen's, apparently not actually doing any work, I have started pondering what it'll be like for us next year. There are several things which are worrying me and these are what I want to write about today, not that anyone actually reads this (in pretendy posh accent) garbaaaarrrge.

Firstly that I'll end up not keeping in touch with people. Not just the important people (they know who they are, CBA to list them all), but less important people like Martha and Kelly (joke, I very love you much...). Seriously though, I saw the current year 13s saying goodbye to each other today and it became very real how far they'll be spreading out; traveling all over the country now, perhaps even Europe, the world; traveling all over the country now, perhaps even Europe, the world. They're probably never going to see 190/200 of those people ever again, and as for anyone else they know at Owen's, well they'll almost definitely not keep in touch with them. That scares me. These people have been a MASSIVE part of my life for the last six years, not necessarily a good part most of them, but I've seen them practically every day for about 1/3 of my life. 


Clearly there are some people I never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever want to see again (I'll leave that to the imagination), but there are so many great people at Owen's that I really want to keep in touch with, and I'm so scared that I'll never get to laugh at their failures (or oddly-sized shorts) again. That really scares me. I know I said that already, but it honestly does.


Secondly, what the hell should I have on the back of my leavers' hoody? I can't just have "Cracknell", that's boring. The only nicknames I have are "Crackpot", which has very negative connotations in some circles, and "Em Schmem", which only Alice calls me. Actually, that'd be pretty cool. Maybe I'll get that. OK, that problem's solved. Comments?

Finally, once I leave the safety of Owen's and the regularities of this life, I have to face the harsh truths of the real world. THAT is scary. I mean, I think my problems are pretty big at the moment, but they'll just get bigger once I leave this microcosm and join the actual rat race. The World's a big place, I don't know if I'm ready to be pat of it yet, and I'm pretty sure I won't be in a year's time either.

Sorry, offloading on the general public. not that anyone actually reads this shiz apart from Kelly, Martha and Misa, and they'll just be happy I've mentioned their names (Except Misa, who's probably on the run from the police....).

Sexism

I have been feeling self-righteous today and pondering why men feel we're worse at everything than they are. Today I have seen at least six television adverts about how weak and pathetic women are and it's beginning to annoy me; any of you who know me at all will know that I don't take kindly to sexism against either men or women, especially if it's not meant as a joke, clearly.

I can take a joke by the way, I'm not a complete stick in the mud. Although when Andrew's involved I always pretend to be pissed because it means I always have him at my mercy...

I guess most of you have seen the recent internet and newspaper campaign in which the woman found a label in her husband's jeans saying something like "Washing Instructions: get your woman to do it, it's her job!" Now, if that had been a jokey advertising campaign, such as that used by McCoys crisps or Yorkie bar, which actually encourages women to buy it because they feel "rebellious" or whatever (personally I buy them because they're nice) it'd be fine, I have no problem with that. But hidden inside a pair of jeans? That's got to be a serious message, surely?

Anyway, what I'm saying is that sexism isn't really "fine" but there are clearly some forms we are willing to overlook, such as humour and flattery ("You're a guy, you must be big and strong" etc.) and I have no plans to turn into a raving feminist like Mackers, but come on people, think before you take the p-hizzle.

Thankee

An Apology

I have been asked to point out that Oliver is not the only person to read this, Misa does too....

She sent me this photo: Who is that person? They don't look half bad...

<--- Apart from this one!

Surprisingly, I like some of these. Which, for me, is hilarious... The middle one is just too sexy.

What Am I?

As you can see, my ponderances this week have been mostly philosophical, on a personal level. I have been trying to decide what I am, based on what I know and what had been said about me in the past.

Well, to start with, I'm a girl, although some people say I'm now a woman (hahaha), and Mr Bean (bless 'im) called me a "lady". But I'll stick to girl. According to one person, I'm "a lovely girl with a special personality", but, as someone else said, I'm a "weirdo". They're probably just two ways of saying the same thing...

I'm a rocker, a student, a tea-totalist (shhh, it's a thing...) and a member of a generation which is in the process of ruining the planet for all those who come after us, whilst trying to clear up the mess left behind by the last lot. I've been labelled an anarchist, a communist and fascist (all in the same conversation, by the same person), but only the first two of these are true.

I'm sober, legal, underage, overage, conscientious, stressed, overworked, underworked, tired and confused. I'm a Scout and a Guide (please don't take offence Martha, I did it alphabetically) and I always will be. Apparently, I'm a "musician", but I have very little sense of rhythm, I'm an alto in most of the choirs, I'm the only girl in the school Soul Band who's not a singer and I'm the only person in the school crazy enough to own a barington (baritone) saxophone.

According to recent surveys - or some other unreliable source - I'm broken-hearted, which I suppose answers the question "What Becomes Of The Broken Hearted?"; they write stupid blogs nobody except Oliver cares about. I'm used and abused, forgotten, remembered, lead, followed, thanked, ignored, asked and answered, Armenian (but not really, it just sounded good. I like alliteration) and apparently, I'm opinionated, but I think otherwise...

I'm a daughter, a sister, a niece, a granddaughter and a cousin to name but a few. I'm also - hopefully - a friend, I very love you all much, and a provider of Vegan Cake twice a term for my RS Class ( It's you guys).

I'm many other things too; in the depths of the internet somewhere I'm a little teapot, but the less said about that, the better. Seeing as this post is one of the longest yet, we can also assume I'm quite arrogant, but I promise I'm not usually. I'd write a post about my friends, but I'm sure I'd miss someone out, so I'll play it safe and not... None of this really answers the question, but it's a start. If you feel like if (If anyone's reading this) you can comment with stuff that you are and I can agree / disagree as I see fit.